


05:29:21

by AdmirableMonster (Mertiya)



Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Alternate Universe - Fusion, Alternate Universe - Historical, Historical References, M/M, Period-Typical Homophobia, Science Boyfriends, Science Experiments, Things Man Was Not Meant To Know, Turning Points
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-01
Updated: 2020-12-01
Packaged: 2021-03-10 04:06:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,132
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27827983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mertiya/pseuds/AdmirableMonster
Summary: Celebrimbor and Annatar observe the culmination of their masterpiece from Compania Hill.
Relationships: Annatar/Celebrimbor | Telperinquar
Comments: 16
Kudos: 31





	05:29:21

Lightning lit up the New Mexico desert.Celebrimbor frowned at it angrily, listening to the hollow roll of thunder that followed.A thunderstorm, in a desert, right now—he knew, logically, that brief but intense thunderstorms were not an unusual occurrence.But it felt too much like a bad omen.

“Calm down,” Annatar told him.“It’s nothing more than a delay.”

Celebrimbor bit down an angry retort, taking a deep breath.“Yes,” he agreed.“Nothing but a delay.”

“Have you decided on your bet yet?” Annatar asked amusedly.As the director of the project, he had tacitly refrained from placing a bet of his own, but Celebrimbor knew he was watching the others with interest.That was how Annatar functioned, it seemed: like a cat, he watched quietly.And then he got results.

“Some of the others are _very_ optimistic,” Celebrimbor said.“I think they will be disappointed.”

“Surely you don’t think it will be a dud?”

“No,” Celebrimbor allowed, his hand tightening as he looked out at the lowering sky.“But 0.3 kilotons of TNT is already a rather large explosion.”

Annatar laughed and looked around the little observer station to ensure they were alone.Then he leaned forward and caught Celebrimbor’s hand in his, raising it to his lips.“Large, perhaps,” he murmured.“But not the stuff of which legends are made.”

Not for the first time, Celebrimbor wondered how his lover had ever risen to the rank of brigadier general.But then—his private persona was entirely different from the one he presented publicly.

“Perhaps I was not born to be a legend,” Celebrimbor told him, trying to keep the bitterness out of his voice.Annatar rose and walked gracefully around the desk to draw the scientist into his arms.

“Do not sell yourself short,” he murmured, kissing Celebrimbor’s lips and then his jaw.“You will not always live in your grandfather’s shadow.Look.”He pointed.Outside, the clouds were rolling back, and the first clear signs of predawn light were shining on the pink desert.“I’ll radio over to see when we can begin.”

Celebrimbor watched the clouds slowly peeling back, losing himself in the jittering static of his anxiety.It would not be a dud.Would it make him a legend?Did he want to be a legend?Was this really where his story led him?After a little while, Annatar’s strong hand on his arm led him outside.“They’re getting set up, there’s nothing left for you to do.Come along.”

They went outside into the dry crisp chill of the desert morning.The land was desolate.Nothing grew here but scrubby bushes.Nothing lived here but lizards.It had been chosen with that in mind, but Celebrimbor’s brain still careened once again through his calculations.Could he be certain that the fallout would not reach further than he had anticipated?He knew he could not be.He also knew they could not wait. 

They drove up in a military jeep.Celebrimbor was losing minutes.He kept finding himself looping through his thoughts and then looked up to find they were closer to the top of Compania Hill.He turned to Annatar.“Did they say—when?”

“We delayed until 05:30.The clouds are forecasted to clear,” Annatar told him.There was no shred of compassion in his voice.There could not be.They were not alone.

“An hour and a half delay is not so bad,” Celebrimbor said, because he needed to say something.Annatar did not respond.

The others met them at the top of the hill, staring down into the valley.It looked normal and quiet.“Here,” said Narvi.“Welding goggles.”

“Oh—thank you.”Celebrimbor took them.“I suppose we had better go lie down,” he said, remembering the instructions he himself had given all of them.Annatar murmured in his ear as they walked to the designated spot, “But you’re going to watch, aren’t you?”

For an instant, the playfulness of their quiet, private lives lay exposed between them, as Celebrimbor smiled genuinely and deeply back.“It’s possible,” he murmured.“Well—how could I not?”

“How could you not, indeed?”

They settled behind the others, and Celebrimbor slipped his hand across the dry ground to tangle their fingers together.Dangerous, but this was a day for danger, wasn’t it?He shook his head.0.3 kilotons, perhaps.By the Valar, he hoped that it was not a dud.

Annatar stroked one long, thin finger across the back of his hand; he pulled a pocket-watch out of his jacket and looked down at it.“Getting close,” he murmured.“You may want to put on your goggles.”

“What about you?”

Those golden eyes shone with a queer light.“I do not need them.”

“Annatar, that is _foolish_ ,” Celebrimbor told him hotly.“What if I’m wrong about the yield?What if—”

“Hush.Put on your goggles.”For an instant, Celebrimbor forgot where he was, forgot the others around them and what they risked, and his breath caught.This was the culmination of everything: every scribbled midnight equation, every calculation the two of them had whispered together into one another’s ears, every disaster, every tragedy—Maeglin’s loss still stung him to the core.Annatar’s eyes were unnaturally bright.His hand caressed Celebrimbor’s cheek.“Put on your goggles,” he repeated, and Celebrimbor was beginning to when someone shouted—

—and he _turned_ , the goggles half on, one over his left eye but his right eye naked.

It was a light that seemed to pierce through him.He saw nothing but white in his right eye, but in his left—through the welding goggles—he saw an upside-down blossom, a cup overturned with smoke pouring out beneath it.The goggles fell from Celebrimbor’s hand.Fire filled the sky—bright red, orange—and then shading away into a deep purple.The outlines of the desert valley beneath were so clear they were like the lines of a printed etching.

A ragged cry went up from the gathered scientists.“At least ten kilotons,” someone was saying eagerly, through the strange buzzing in Celebrimbor’s head.

He had never seen anything like it.He could not have imagined the scale of it.The numbers laid down upon paper had not compassed it; it was beyond anything he had seen before.He had not watched Maeglin die: but Maeglin had died for this—this raw, incomprehensible power.Majesty.Overwhelming terror; overwhelming beauty.

This was the stuff of which legends were made. 

“ _Trinity_ , you called it, when they asked you for a name,” Annatar whispered, his voice greedy, eager, hushed.“And I am the only one who knows why.But this trinity—this trinity is far greater than Fëanor’s, is it not, my dear?”

Celebrimbor could only stare at the devastation wrought, and weep.

**Author's Note:**

> for further reference (and where I found some very useful descriptons): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trinity_(nuclear_test)
> 
> haha did i just make tyelpe low-key robert oppenheimer and annatar leslie groves? why yes i did


End file.
